!Bolf

New !Bolf Rules, or Opportunities

Playing with people who actually golf gives rise to new !bolfing opportunities. Add these to your list:

1. The Rename. When playing in a golf tournament that requires your whole group to hit off each person's ball a minimum number of times (this means !bolfers shots, too), identify the best person in your group. Half way through the round, start calling the most talented golfer by your name. That way, when the scorekeeper asks whose ball the group just used, your name can be called out. And your box checked. Viola.

Best part - for the rest of the round, you get to hear people say "Nice shot [insert your name]!"  It happened to me. It can happen to you, too.

2. The Win-Win-Win. When someone in your group has a bad shot, and cares, give them your shot by calling out "[insert your name] Mulligan". Then, you get to go sit in the shade, the golfer who sucked and cares gets to hit again, and you're group doesn't slow anyone down. Win-win-win.

3. The Green Guinea Pig. Golfers seem to care about the green. How it slopes. Things like that. Because !bolfers don't, we can help others out by always putting first to let the golf people assess how our ball moves across the green. Since our point isn't about getting that ball in that hole, what's it to us to be the green guinea pig?

!Bolf evolves.

Not "cheating"; !Bolf!

Perhaps the original !bolfer. Watch this.

!Bolf Score Card

What is !bolf without a proper score card.
Here. No legal rights have been sought.
Copy. Share. !Bolf.

 

    !BOLF SCORE CARD

                 1        2        3       4         5      6       7        8       9

(Never, Ever Play More Than 9)

 

1. # of Golf Swings

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­2. # of Bolf Tosses

3. LRCB

4. In Hole?  (Y/N)

(never mandatory)

5. # of Good Swings

(always try....)

6. Was it Fun? (Y/N)

7. Get or Give Applause? (Y/N)

Add up your of Golf Swings and Bolf Tosses. Add a point for each LRCB. Subtract a point for every Yes. (Yes, you can shave up to 18 points off your score by having fun on each hole and giving a little applause to the person you are playing with.)

Remember the number of good swings for next time. Try to increase that number as the years go, but never count it. Good swings are not what we're all about.

 

!Bolf's Coming Out

Ok ok ok. It's official. !Bolf is here.

The growing interest in the game, and the volume of inquiries about the game, led me to go live.

Let's start with answers to the most frequently asked !bolf questions.

1. Whats !bolf?  !Bolf is a combination of golf and bowling. Hence, Bolf.

The wind-up

2. Whats the point? Gettin' out there. Not worryin'. Playin' for fun.

3. Why !bolf? Golf, in its traditional, old-fashioned form, is hard, strict and frustrating. It keeps away for no really godo reason lots of people who would enjoy the time outside on beautiful land and the challenge of moving a ball from here to there. The time it takes to get respectable at golf, played in the traditional way, keeps lotsa girls - and boys - from getting in on the golf thing, from the playing to the post golf lets-get-a-drink-thing. By adopting new rules - a new paradigm - a day on the golf course is fun. Right away. Promise.

4. Whats up with the exclamation point in front of the word bolf? The sheer excitement of not having to golf but getting to spend the day on the course tossing around a ball put the exclamation right out front. And thats where its staying.

5. Do you need anything to play !bolf other than golf stuff? No. In fact, !bolfers like to share !bolf clubs. A !bolfer needn't own her own stuff to get out there. How you hit in !bolf matters so much less than how you hit in golf, there is no basis for every single person to have to go buy clubs and stuff just to play. The point is to play. But you want to look good. Buy the shoes. Stuff like that. You want to blend in. When your !bolfing foursome rides past golfers, they shouldn't know which game you are playing just by looking at you. Spiff it up.

6. What are the rules of !bolf? The complete set of rules will be posted elsewhere, but in short its this. You hit the ball off the tee with the club. You don't worry lots about where the ball lands. If it goes to a good place, great. Hit it again from there. If it goes to a rediculous place, thats ok too. Its part of the game. If that happens, go get your ball if you want, or leave it. Whatever. Drive up the fairway some around to where you wish your ball had landed. From there, toss the ball. This is the Bowl part. Toss it a short way, or really try to get some distance. Pay attention to your form: look like a serious bowler out there. Golf or bowl as many times per hole as you like or need. Whatever. The number of times you !bolf and golf per hole will be tallied, but its not like one is better than the other. We're not that way.

In the midst of all this, start to learn and respect the rules of golf. If your ball lands in the sand trap, and you think it would be fun to try to hit it out, get in there but do rake up after yourself. !Bolfers respect the basic rules of golf that make a difference to others. We do not care in the least about the rules pertaining to things like how we go about getting our ball into the hole. That has no impact on others.   

Another part of !bolfing is the LRCB. That stands for Long Ride Carrying Ball. Here is when you use it. If its a really long hole, the kind where you can barely see the green from the tee, whack the ball once. Get in your cart, pick up your ball and put it in your pocket. If you need to bend really far to reach it, ask your cart-mate to hold your belt loops so you don't tumble out. !Bolfers care about appearances. Then, drive for as long as you like toward the green. At some point - its all up to you - hop out and !bolf the ball to where you might like to hit it from. Count the number of LRCBs per hole. Generally, one will do. Sometimes, none are needed. Whatever. The LRCB is really useful on days when the course is crowded. Moving along through the LRCB reduces anxiety intentionally inflicted by some fast, serious, uninteresting golfers.

In !bolf, don't get all preoccupied with getting ball in the teeny hole. Get to the green, take a few tries, and move on if you want. So, on the scorecard, keep track with a simple YES or NO as to whether you actually got the ball into the hole. With the club. (Sometimes, you like to hear the sound of the ball going into the hole. But you really want to move on.  Pick it up. Toss it in there, manually. Enjoy the sound.). Its all up to you how persistent you want to be about getting a YES.

!Bolfers also tally how many honest, actual good golf shots you have per hole. Why not?

Finally, !bolfers are wildly supportive of each other. Cheer and clap right out loud for anything at all another !bolfer does that looks pretty good. Its worth points, and everyone feels better than they did before the applause.